Yaroslava Antipina prefers her "battle espresso" black — no sugar. Each day, she sips on the cup, watching a lethal assault unfold exterior her window as her life strays farther from the one she has at all times identified.
Antipina has turned her Twitter account right into a real-time diary of what it's actually wish to be an "abnormal" particular person residing by way of battle, documenting her expertise and posting images since she awoke to the sound of explosions in Kyiv greater than two weeks in the past. With a number of updates each day, she has amassed greater than 82,000 followers as she particulars the fixed rollercoaster of feelings, ideas and experiences.
It began on February 24: "11:45 p.m. in Kyiv. We determined that if we'll sleep somewhat solely totally dressed. The backpacks are prepared."
She and her son tried to remain in Kyiv, stocking up on meals and staying indoors with solely the sounds of explosions breaking a aggravating silence. Antipina's mom, who lives in western Ukraine, had been calling her, crying and frightened over the scenario. 5 days after the invasion, they determined to go be together with her.
The day they left, March 1, Antipina posted a photograph of a small, gray hard-shell suitcase.
"It is all I can take with me. All my life is [in] this bag," she tweeted.
This second has caught together with her ever since. The suitcase, she advised CBS Information, represents the despair in leaving a way of normalcy behind.
"I do not know, nonetheless do not know, if I can return. It isn't simply the issues, the belongings. It is about reminiscences, individuals, all the pieces I had," she stated. "My coffees, my simply common days, all of the issues I can't have with me, I could not take. I do know that I am fortunate as a result of I do know individuals moved with out something, simply in garments as they're."
Antipina says she would give something to return to that point. Any issues she handled do not seem to be such an enormous deal anymore.
"Struggle is an issue," she stated.
Moments earlier than leaving their house, Antipina took a closing look exterior their window — a view of Kyiv's newly barren streets as individuals hid and fled amid freshly-fallen snow. She stated that day was the primary time it had snowed in Kyiv all February.
"11:02 am someplace in Kyiv. It was the final view from my window. My damaged coronary heart is crying," she wrote on Twitter. "...We're escaping."
Earlier than all this started, Antipina stated she had an "abnormal" life. She began each morning with espresso and sweets. She labored each within the workplace and from house throughout the week, and on weekends, would get pleasure from a cappuccino, hearken to podcasts and skim books. Above her condominium lives a "sneezing man," whom she has by no means met, has no thought what he seems like, and but usually ponders over in her Twitter diary, questioning how he is doing all through the battle.
She did not understand how regular her life was in the mean time. Now, only a few individuals roam the streets of her metropolis and kids are not often seen in public. It feels as if "years" have handed, she stated.
When CBS Information spoke with Antipa, she and her son have been in her mom's house, attempting to maintain some sense of what she calls "that" life.
"It is two completely different lives. In that life, I had peace. I had my common actions. And on this life, I've a battle," she advised CBS Information. "I'll by no means have that life again as a result of I've modified. Our cities have modified. We [Ukrainians] have modified."
In "this" life, her sister and her sister's three younger kids have fled the nation. Her son, 19, has not joined Ukraine's territorial protection forces, however has stated he'll if and when it turns into obligatory.
"If he involves struggle, to the territorial protection or to the military, I'll be a part of too," she stated. "It is not possible for me simply to take a seat right here when my son is preventing. It is not possible. ... It is scary as a result of your solely youngster will likely be within the battle."
Antipa usually talks about her "battle espresso" in her tweets. There's nothing bodily distinctive in regards to the drink, nevertheless it acts as a tangible reminder that all the pieces she craves, loves and needs is fragile, as each passing second of battle may carry a tougher circumstance.
The espresso, together with the picture of her final look exterior her Kyiv condominium and her and her son's dream of touring the world with a cat they are going to title "Victory" — "Victor" if it's a male, and "Victoria" if it's a feminine — are her "little issues of hope."
"Struggle espresso is resistance. Power," she stated. "...We Ukrainians want such issues to outlive, to be sturdy. As a result of for me the very exhausting factor proper now's the uncertainty. You do not know what is going on on the following day, subsequent week. However we are going to handle. ... We now have no alternative."
Folks from all world wide have responded to her tweets with their love, and their "peace espresso" in hand. Pictures of espresso mugs have flooded her replies from Tennessee, Seattle, Illinois and numerous different locations.
Protecting the diary has helped her address the scenario and bear in mind how issues have advanced. However, she stated, it is also for future generations.
"To indicate them what the world actually is, for you, for us, for abnormal individuals," she stated. "...It isn't about solely blood, et cetera, however how our life might be modified in a single second, and the way vital [it is] to maintain this peace. And the way vital [it is] to be sturdy in any scenario."
"However [it's] additionally for them to be sturdy, to get pleasure from life and to maintain the peace in every single place on the planet, in each nation. It is essential as a result of the world is proudly owning all the pieces — households, lives, houses, hearts, all the pieces."